16 minutes ago
32,305 notes


Meanwhile, Sherlock.

This may literally be my favorite 5 seconds in the entire show.

22 hours ago
120,085 notes


plot twist: you scream to your mom who’s in her room to come to the table because you already made the dinner

22 hours ago
256,248 notes



a restaurant in my hometown got a review that said the servers should “show some skin” so the owner added a potato skin special to the menu and all the proceeds from the special go to the west virginia foundation for rape information services (x)

That’s exactly the appropriate response.

22 hours ago
178,891 notes
22 hours ago
72,021 notes


go into a starbucks in NYC and say very loudly into your phone “this movie script is stale and trite! we need some new talent, someone with a fresh outlook” and wait

22 hours ago
271,401 notes
2 days ago
27,539 notes
2 days ago
66,797 notes
2 days ago
488,745 notes


kids born in 2000 never have to worry about forgetting how old they are

2 days ago
19,913 notes

2 days ago
12,848 notes

why is this in my house


why is this in my house

2 days ago
65,306 notes

reasons why periods suck


  • u get horny over fucking everything
  • blood
  • you fucking ruin your panties
  • fuck
  • what the hell
  • people just fucking stop
  • this list is fucking awful

2 days ago
468,050 notes


is that dirt on my computer screen or punctuation               .

2 days ago
88,344 notes


they may be a minor character but they are a major character in my heart

2 days ago
118,488 notes
Track: Unknown
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Played: 794585 times



Anonymous said:

Hey dude I love your dramatic readings. Anyway, can you read the name of every state in America in the most seductive way possible? In alphabetical order please.

what the fuck


Well, OKAY.

Saying the Names of All 50 States in Alphabetical OrderSeductively



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